Who the f*** are you to tell me I'm just like everybody else?
I'm sure as f*** not like you!
And who the f*** are you to instruct me in the "value of diversity"
When all of your ideas are carbon copies?

I've argued with militant black guys.
I'd even go verbally toe-to-toe with Tim Wise.
But you I despise because nothing you say is from the heart,
Though you seem to think your brain farts are great works of art.

So excuse these perturbations of your rhetorical gyrations
And mental masturbations
But you've got to stop expecting respect for your baloney
And brace yourself for a great wave of derision
Because my vision will reverse your perverse inversions
And excursions into fairy tales where you are always the princess.

Hey, why should I care how many dried up kernels of corn
Were found under your twenty matresses
When I have to hide my true feelings with asterisks?

So when you talk shit about "diversity,"
Excuse me, but I take it personally --
I am a singularity, a point of consciousness in the universe of everything,
Which includes your simpering crap to the effect that
You can improve my mentality by picking my friends for me.
As long as they don't look like me.
Honestly, that's nothing to worry about.

Pardon me, but I think you're insane
When you say that differences are all the same,
That you are rightly in charge of the whole game,
But if anything goes wrong, then I'm to blame.

If I were lucky enough to have a pair of Carrie Underwood's underwear
I'd carry it around with me everywhere.
Would this be perverse, diverse or something worse?
I'm not going to nurse a boatload of resentment
And reherse revolutionary tirades for diag rallies
And subsequent parades all the way to Stockwell.
I'd rather be terse.

But all you care about is what I bring to the great diversity auction block.
Well, I'm just a commodity, I guess, or some kind of zoological oddity.
Hey, you are not worthy of my precious weirdness!
It might be stilted or a bit tilted, but it is authentic.
This rap is authentic, too: Some of the words rhyme
And I say "F*** you" three times.
Plus, it is angry, self-absorbed and viciously clever.

Pardon me, but I think you're insane
When you say that differences are all the same,
That you are rightly in charge of the whole game,
But if anything goes wrong, then I'm to blame.

Do you listen to the voters?
Hello no, "diverse democracy" means you alone
Have the authority to change society.
If we disagree, well, shucks, we're just plain flippin' wrong, aren't we?
Let me tell you -- your strutting around in your nexus of drivel
Does nothing for anyone -- black, white, red, yellow, puce,
Periwinkle, chartreuse or gray like a French goose from Toulouse.

Some aspects of intelligence are culturally constructed.
You have constructed machinery of monumental stupidity.
So f*** you and your phoney sensitivity!
Why should your failure to perform deform my world?
You guys suffer from I.D. -- Intellectual Dysfunction!
You pretend you are morally courageous,
But in fact you're just orally contagious.

I've come across ideas that are trippy and amazing
From imaginations and intellects blazing
With passion and insight. Darwin's theories, Maxwell's equations for light.
But your insipid blatherings about diversity are utterly trite.

Someday some professor somewhere will hear this rap and say,
"F***! This d***head has it right!"
It will be the beginning of the end of a really weird era!
Amen! F*** you and goodnight!

Pardon me, but I think you're insane
When you say that differences are all the same,
That you are rightly in charge of the whole game,
But if anything goes wrong, then I'm to blame.